I have a long, illustrious history of eating poorly. In fact, just last night I bought a half-gallon of key lime pie ice cream (I said I bought it, not ate it all, -- even my eating habits aren't that bad). It's made by Bluebell and has key lime flavoured ice cream and graham cracker bits, then they swirled in whipped topping. Delicious. Sitting just to my left, next to the computer, is an almond Snickers bar. It's feeling lonely because the dark chocolate peanut M&Ms are already gone.
But aren't we all going for a little self-improvement? I decided I'd start packing healthy, low-calorie lunches to work. You know, a Lean Cuisine, a couple of snacks, maybe some yogurt and fruit. Yeah! It'd be great! I could snack throughout the day on healthy things and have a low-cal lunch and be good to go! I went to the grocery store and stocked up on the necessary items: soymilk, low-fat vanilla yogurt, vanilla chai protein shake mix and frozen fruit (these popped in a blender = breakfast), the Lean Cuisines, some fruit, snack-able veggies (carrots, cucumbers, etc.) and arrived home with a newfound sense of satisfaction.
I packed my lunch for the following day: 1 Lean Cuisine microwaveable dinner, 1 package of Snack Wells cookies, 1 package of low-calorie Cheez Nips, and half a cucumber, sliced into stalks with a side of 1 tablespoon low fat, low-calorie italian dressing (what? You don't expect me to eat plain vegetables, do you?)
Naturally, everything got eaten except for the cucumber slices. I packed up my bag to go home (laptop: check, mouse: check, mousepad: check, power adapter: check, leftover cucumber slices: check), and when I got home, I pulled out only the power adapter and my laptop from the bag. And then promptly forgot about the food.
Now, I've had a cold this week and my nose and sinuses have been so clogged up I was seriously considering calling a plumber. However, I took a day off yesterday and just kind of relaxed, rested up and such, trying to recover. I'm still not 100%, but by this morning I was able to utilise a bit of my sense of smell. This was unfortunate, see, because cucumbers really like refrigeration and as it turns out, once they're sliced up if you don't refrigerate them, they mutate into horrible, terrible things which emit the most foul-smelling odor I think I've ever had the chance to inhale. I think a decaying corpse might smell just half as bad. The worst part was that it was inside my backpack. With my mousepad and mouse. So now, I have to throw the mousepad out (you just can't get the smell out of something that absorbent) and I had to wipe down the mouse thoroughly with rubbing alcohol AND I'm going to have to completely empty out my bag and run it through the washing machine.
Yech. If this is what I get for trying to eat right, I'll take more ice cream, please.
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